Millie went in on May 8th for her fifth round of chemo. I've been putting off this post, but know it is something I have to write...so here goes.
At drop off the staff debated whether or not they wanted to do chest x-rays. She had been perfectly clear about six weeks ago, and they usually wait longer in between radiographs. On the other hand, I wanted to start metronomic chemo (oral chemo) as soon as possible, so x-rays would give a baseline of where we were before starting that. They still weren't sure what they wanted to do when I left, so they said they'd talk to the staff oncologist & give me a call shortly. About 40 minutes later, they called -- Yes, they do want x-rays. I was fine with that, and she said she really doubted they'd see anything, but it was just a formality.
11:30ish rolls around & I get another call from U of I. This time I knew something was wrong. The staff oncologist was calling me, not the chemo tech. They had found two, 7-9mm mets in her lungs, and maybe a smaller third nodule. The cancer had spread.
The. Cancer. Has. Spread.
The. Cancer. Has. Spread.
It's been two days now, and I still don't want to believe it. Sure, this happens to other dogs....dogs I know even, but not MY dog. MY dog was going to be that lucky 2-3%. What the f___!? Ugh.
Here's her radiograph from the 8th. All that fuzzy stuff that you assume is cancer...is not. The nodules are tiny specks that she could only find herself after zooming in 3x on the screen.
I was told I had a few options. 1. Do nothing. 2. Do a different IV chemo drug. 3. Do metronomic chemo. 4. Do both the new IV chemo & metronomic at the same time. 5. Give a different type of oral chemo that is relatively new to veterinary medicine (has one paper written about it, but not a lot of research with bone cancer).
I asked what she thought the best choice was at slowing the progression of the cancer while still giving Millie an excellent quality of life. She said new IV chemo drug + metronomic. The side effects of the new IV chemo drug are basically the same as the first drug she was on, but can be a bit worse in some dogs. It can also be cardiotoxic, but since Mil doesn't have any heart issues the risk of that are very minimal. Metronomic chemo can be a bit tough on her bladder (and we all know how sensitive her bladder is), so they would give her Lasix to help (makes her drink more water & pee more....so hopefully minimizing the irritation to her bladder). The plan would be to start the new IV chemo (which she was given that day), go in the following week to make sure her white cells are okay, and then start metronomic chemo. Ultimately, they hope to complete 5 rounds of IV chemo - one every three weeks. I say hope because they gave me a life expectancy of 2-6 months. They expect 3-4, and say 6 would be extremely lucky. We are hoping for extremely lucky +!
U of I was incredibly slow, and I had to wait over an hour past the pick up time to see my girl. Talk about frustrating. She was so excited to see me & Nana (who came home early from her roadtrip & drove two hours to come home after I called her sobbing). The doctors assured me that outwardly Millie looked excellent. She was clearly happy & in no way suffering. They assured me that mets in the lungs are not painful. If they continue to grow (which we are hoping against all odds that they won't), it'll feel more like a chest cold. They said that towards the end of their lives dogs with OSA are usually euthanized because of some sort of quality of life issue or the cancer spreads to another bone.
I will continue to fight for my girl as long as she wants to keep fighting. I have promised her that I will not push her, and that I will continue to take my cues from her. Until that time, this dog is getting whatever she wants and then some. We will absolutely make the best out of the time we have left together.
Example #1 -- Bark at whatever the hell she wants. Here she and Shugs are letting a neighborhood outdoor cat know that we already have enough cats in our apartment.
Example #2 -- Take her in places that maybe she isn't "allowed", but who the hell really cares?
I had to go to the radio station that sponsored "Mutt Strut" to pick up the remainder of her prize. Yup, totally took her in the building with me. I mean really...what's the worst they could say, right? ;)
Example #3 -- If she wants to go to work with me, she WILL go to work with me.
Example #5 -- Manners? Eh...we can blur the lines a little. Here she is checking out her prizes from the Cutest Mutt contest. Go for it sister!
This picture is really terrible quality and I'm not sure why. Anyway, she fell asleep at work, but was still holding on to her bone. Ah-freaking-dorable!
So far she seems to be feeling great. She may be a touch tired, but I may just be looking for signs. She's got a great appetite & doesn't have an upset stomach at all. Also *knocking on wood* no signs of a UTI yet. I'm hoping her body continues to handle the chemo as well as it has in the past.
So, in the spirit of living every single day to the fullest, I've decided to make a bucket list for Millie. Some of these I'll need a little help with. I'm also open to adding more to the list. So, if you have any ideas...whether that be things I do with Millie alone, or things you want to help me with....I'm all ears!
1. Go to a beach
2. Have a party in my honor
3. Wear a pretty bandana that was made by my Nana
4. Skype with my buddies Vegas & Freya
5. Get muddy
6. Eat an ice cream cone
7. Eat something Mom would never allow me to have (like Reese's cups!)
8. Paint something for my mom
9. Go through my favorite drive thru - Hickory River!
10. Go through my second favorite drive thru - Starbucks!
11. Ride in a convertible - with the top down, of course! (This one I'll need help with!)
12. Meet/See/Bark at an animal bigger than I am
13. Chase (but not eat) some geese
14. Take some beautiful pictures with my mom & doggie sister
15. Eat all of Sugar's food. I want to do this everyday, but my mom always says no.
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